Topical Study – Jesus: New BeginningsIn the beginning of this New Year, Pastor Leitu, teaching from John 3:1-9, shares that now is the time of salvation, and that Jesus provides the New Beginning!
Or watch on Youtube
Thank you Pastor Leitu. I am so grateful to be born in His Spirit and to know He is still making me more like Him. Removing my flesh nature will be ongoing until I am glorified. And that day can’t come soon enough!!!
Brokenness - Part 1
Sometimes we might have to walk in darkness with no light, the journey in Lo Debar (Land of Nothing) is long because what God works in us requires time, some things simply cannot be achieved in an instant, they require time. And God says it’s normal to sometimes walk in darkness. Like Job, chances are we will not find out why God allows it, but I know and trust 100% that God always has a good reason. And being aware of the fact that God has a good reason helps when there is no light. Many will not find out what the reason is until we see Jesus. And that is fine, because we are called to walk by faith, not by sight. Until until the day dawns and the morning star rises, we walk by faith in God’s absolute perfect character revealed to us in Jesus Christ.
*Who among you fears the LORD? Who obeys the voice of His Servant? Who walks in darkness And has no light?
Let him trust in the name of the LORD And rely upon his God.
Isaiah 50:10
What follows is a well written story backed up by biblical facts of a man who experienced darkness. The insights are rare gems, delicate fine truths that get to the heart of those who are experiencing brokenness, darkness and no light.
Maybe it encourages someone else… God Bless!
by Dave Gipson
7 minute read
I’m sitting in a sanctuary of around 1500 people this Sunday morning. But I feel completely alone.
We had just been through a whirlwind of death and then disappointment the previous year. Now we were in-between where we had been and where we were going. And we had no idea where that was.
This was the first time I remembered worshiping in a church where I was not on staff. I had been a church pastor for almost 30 years and now suddenly I was on the other side of the pulpit. The church I was attending now had a wise, insightful pastor and a spirit-led worship team. They were so functional, there wasn’t one gift I had that they needed.
That was okay, because I had nothing left to give.
I was done.
That year we’d been through two deaths in the family and a series of frustrating ministry experiences. I stepped away from pastoring my church, resigning with the intent of helping our extended family cope with those deaths. It was a noble enough goal, only I soon discovered I wasn’t up for it.
You can’t help others when you’ve got nothing left to help with.
We moved here to this new place also hoping to find a place of ministry, a new church home I could pastor. But the prospects I set my hopes on dried up within just a few months of our arrival. I could write all the details here of what happened to bring me to this place, but none of them really matter. What matters is finding yourself completely displaced and useless. That hollow, punch-drunk feeling where you’ve been so beaten up you’re just trying to put one foot in front of the other every morning.
I was numb and completely spent. I didn’t have the strength spiritually to risk hoping again, if that makes any sense.
I’m not detailing this to wallow in self-pity. I’m just wondering if maybe someone reading this now can remember ever feeling this way. Or maybe you feel that way right now…
So I sat in my seat on the second row, left-hand side of a wonderful megachurch. They had no idea I was a broken pastor sitting in their congregation. I was waiting for God to speak to me, to heal me. Whatever, but just do something with me.
While I was there, the worship team sang words I held onto for dear life. Words that said God is a way-maker, a miracle worker. That even when I couldn’t see him, he was still working for my good. The pastor’s messages were like therapy sessions, speaking directly to my struggles. The words they used were nothing new to me, but it was as if God was now speaking them all directly to me.
Brokenness - Part 2
If there was anyone in the Bible I related to then, it was Mephibosheth. You can find him in 2 Samuel chapter 9, but don’t feel bad if you’ve never heard of him. He was one of King Saul’s grandkids, the son of Jonathan (King David’s friend) and directly in line for the throne of Israel. But when his grandfather’s kingdom fell, as the royal family fled he was gathered up by his nurse.
In the chaos, the young boy was dropped. Both his legs were crushed, and he entered his exile crippled for life.
Sitting in that massive sanctuary, Mephibosheth was a perfect picture of how I saw myself. I had wanted to do great things for God. I was willing to take huge risks and push myself to achieve and produce continually. All my life people had told me my gifts destined me to do something significant for God. Just as the voices around him probably made Mephibosheth feel he was on the fast track to the top, so did I.
But then, someone dropped me. At least, that’s what it felt like. Friends I trusted abandoned me. My gifts seemed suddenly powerless to face the challenges in front of me. Things that used to be easy for me were now hard. Nothing worked anymore. As I sat listening to the great preaching and worship each Sunday, I watched others excel at what I used to do. In my prayers to God, I was now noticing a tinge of resentment.
I struggled with the thought it was actually God who had dropped me.
When you’re lame, you don’t see yourself as a threat. But even in a broken condition, a potential king is seen as a challenge by others. It was the same with Mephibosheth. As someone of royal lineage, even a lame heir might be a threat to a rival king. So the boy’s nurse took him far away to hide.
I love the name of the place they hid him away: LO DEBAR.
That name meant “land of nothing.” That’s exactly where I felt God was hiding me away after I’d been dropped. Lo Debar was my seat in the second row, left side.
One Sunday in my chair, I asked God why he was trying to break me so thoroughly. Had I done something to make him banish me from ministry? If so, please just tell me what it is so I can repent of it. Don’t leave me in the dark. Suffering is hard enough without knowing why you suffer. The “why” at least gives the suffering purpose.
My answer came one Sunday when we were observing Communion. God reminded me of the significance of Jesus breaking the bread. Breaking means tearing, ripping it apart. That was exactly what God was doing to me.
When Jesus fed the 5000, He blessed that bread also and broke it. The breaking was part of his miraculous process. I suppose he could have just made several thousand loaves of bread appear out of thin air. Instead, he took what was there and multiplied it by breaking it.
Note to self: If you want to be used by God, if you want to nourish others, prepare to be broken.
In Westerns, I always heard about “breaking a horse” but never really understood what was happening. It always seemed like some burly cowboy wrestling a poor horse into submission. But that’s not how it works. Breaking is simply training the horse to be under the control of the rider.
The breaking process can take anywhere from 30 to 60 days or more. An unbroken horse must be trained to accept a saddle and bridle. He must be taught not to resist the weight of the rider on his back. The horse is taught one habit at a time, each subsequent habit building on the last one. The horse learns to incrementally give up his own control until he is finally completely under the rider’s control.
Though I’ve been told I eat like a horse, I never expected God to treat me like one. But it seems that’s exactly what he had been doing.
Just like the horse’s strength, my gifts in preaching, music, or writing were all good things but not what I was supposed to rely upon. God wanted them all working to bring him glory, but he wanted to me to depend only on him. God was tired of watching me “make things happen” without him. Instead, he wanted to make changes in his own time and his own way.
Like a good trainer, he resisted my bucking and running off in my own direction. Like a good host, he broke me into pieces so there would be more of me to go around. And like Mephibosheth, God had crippled me so I couldn’t put my weight on what I depended on before. Now I was forced to lean on him.
When what you relied on won’t hold you up anymore, inevitably you have to put your weight on something or someone else. But few of us do that on our own. Instead, God has to break our legs so we won’t run off in our own unguided strength and plunge over the mountain cliff.
A.W. Tozer said, “It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until He has hurt him deeply.” It is in our very breaking that the blessing is found. No breaking, no miracles. Until you’re broken, you will run off in your own direction. You’ll work in your own power, not the Spirit’s. So every result you get will be only what your own strength can accomplish, and not a work empowered by God’s Spirit.
What a blessing it truly is to be broken by the Master!
So what happened to Mephibosheth? Wouldn’t you know it, the next king did track him down to his hideout in Lo Debar. But not to kill him, but to bless him!
“Don’t be afraid,” David said to him, “for I will surely show you kindness for the sake of your father Jonathan. I will restore to you all the land that belonged to your grandfather Saul, and you will always eat at my table.”
So King David, who not coincidentally had Jesus as a descendant, decided he wanted to bless the offspring of his old friend Jonathan. Mephibosheth was brought back to the palace for which he was originally destined. All his rights and privileges were restored to him, and now he even ate at the King’s table.
There’s something truly beautiful known only by the broken among us who sit at the King’s table. You see, sitting there we are all royal family members. Both the strong and the weak are seated at the same height. No one’s looking under the table.
When you’re seated at the King’s table, no one can tell how crippled you are!
I thank God for that season of brokenness and for the wounds I still carry from it. It was painful, and I’d be lying if I said I’d fully recovered from it. Honestly, I’ll never quite be able to walk the same again.
But the good thing about not being able to walk without help is Jesus will make sure you never walk alone.
God Bless!
I wanted to remove this - thank you for your prayers
I agree with you 100%…
I’ve been through severe suffering multiple times in my life, and even though the LORD sustained me and delivered me each time (not when I wanted, but when He thought it best), I know it can happen again. I know the LORD has every right to break me and mold me as He is the Potter and I am the clay. What could I say to Him?
However, suffering as a Christian in this world is not simply and always because God wants to mold us. Our suffering also has to do with the spiritual realm and with the fact that we belong to Jesus. I can’t explain it as we don’t have access to that spiritual dimension (one can’t explain Geometry to a 1 year old - that’s how I can accept that there are things in the spiritual realm that cannot be grasped). We know that dimension exists, yet we cannot understand it. The only way for the Christian is to walk by faith in what the Word of God tells us. I have to accept that.
These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world. John 16:33
One book that was of tremendous help to me personally is written by Oswald Chambers: Baffled to Fight Better - Job and the Problem of Suffering. God worked things in such a way that right before my first episode of severe suffering, I bought that book and could not let it down.
The very amazing detail about Job is that he knew in his heart (by the Spirit) that God is perfect. His character is absolutely faultless, you cannot find any blemish in Him. That’s what he believed in his heart about God, until the very end. Yes, Job was impatient, voiced out his suffering and argued a lot, but he persevered in his faith in God’s character.
We know God allowed Satan to attack Job.
Quoting a bit from Chambers.
(Verses 6-12 are a record of the supernatural; there is nothing familiar to our minds in them.0
”Now there was a day when the sons of God came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan also came among them. The Lord said to Satan, “From where do you come?” Then Satan answered the Lord and said, “From roaming about on the earth and walking around on it.” The Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered My servant Job? For there is no one like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, fearing God and turning away from evil.” Then Satan answered the Lord, “Does Job fear God for nothing? Have You not made a hedge about him and his house and all that he has, on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. But put forth Your hand now and touch all that he has; he will surely curse You to Your face.” Then the Lord said to Satan, “Behold, all that he has is in your power, only do not put forth your hand on him.” So Satan departed from the presence of the Lord.“Job 1:6-12
The Bible deals with what no ordinary mind sees— the scenery behind the things that are seen. We have means of inferring the existence of a supernatural world only when it interferes with us. These verses refer to something that happened in the supernatural world, and it is what happened there that accounts for Job’s sufferings; therefore the upset which came into the life of this great and good man is not to be laid to his account.”
“God never once makes His way clear to Job. Job struggles with problem after problem, and Providence brings more problems all the time.”
And Chambers is correct; God hadn’t explained to Job what was going to happen. Job was not aware of the conversation that took place in heaven, between God and Satan.
“The explanation of the whole thing lies in the fact that God and Satan had made a battleground of Job’s soul, without Job’s permission, and without notice.
Without any warning, Job’s life is suddenly turned into desperate havoc and God keeps out of sight, and never gives any sign whatever to Job that He is. The odds are desperately against God, and it looks as if the sneer of Satan will prove to be true; but God wins in the end, Job comes out triumphant in his faith in God, and Satan is completely vanquished.”
We know about the conversation in the spiritual realm, Job didn’t. The book of Job is not meant to explain why we suffer, but rather to make us understand that God always has a good, loving, just, perfect reason why He allows it, and it has to do with our faith in Him and the spiritual powers in the heavenlies. And we will only find out why when we see Him.
Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:10-11
There are so many rich details in the book of Job, and Chambers’ writings shed a much needed light on them for the sufferer.
I pray God strengthens you throughout your journey, the road is very rough, but our God never lets go of us. Never.
God Bless You!
Sincerely,
Anca
we all need so much grace these days. I pray the LORD sustains you as only He can.
God Bless!
Edit: I removed the irelevant part of this post @Mercy-me since you made it clear that you meant “the place you’re in at this moment”. See, God also removed all sin from us through Jesus’ work on the cross. We were wiped clean of all sin by His blood!
I wanted to remove this - thank you for your prayers
I’m really sorry for how things turned out in your life. Remember, the LORD forgave all of our sins, past, present and future. It appears you’re not in denial of your sin, you actually regret it. That means repentance. While the Spirit convicts us of our sins in order that we may repent and grow, He does not accuse, neither remind us constantly of past sin. Christ took care of that sin at the Cross already. The accusing, the shaming comes from the Enemy (Satan). Believe in God’s forgiveness, don’t believe the Enemy.
Remember David? A man after God’s own heart? He failed miserably. We are to learn from David’s failure that God will always forgive us. If you already confessed your sin to the LORD, your relationship with Him is restored:
If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us.
My little children, these things I write to you, so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. 2 And He Himself is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the whole world. (1 John 1:8-10, 2:1)
Believe what the Word of God says, above everything else, feelings, own thoughts, other people’s opinions etc. You have forgiveness for all of your sins already.
These days it is not easy to find a church that can help. I have experienced that same problem in my life for quite a while. Sadly, sometimes immature people in churches “shoot their own wounded” rather than help them recover. However, I have found great comfort in reading about suffering. There are good books out there written by people who experienced a great deal of suffering. Those can speak and encourage you on the way. Also, pastor JD teaches with much needed grace about suffering and God’s forgiveness.
There is NO sin He cannot forgive. Remember that. It’s the truth.
Mercy Me, I am glad you have come back to this forum. This church CCK is a wonderful place to heal, to learn an grow in the Lord.You are not alone and we care for you and wll gladly keep you lifted in prayer.
Hi @Mercy-me
I pray and trust the LORD is strengthening you in these difficult times in your life. I wanted to point out something amazing. Your sharing of the hardships you find yourself in at this time is something wonderful, something God can use to encourage so many other people. I know for a fact there people on this forum who go through a significant amount of distress, and maybe most of them can’t even get themselves to share their struggles. And that’s perfectly fine.
But look, you shared your experience, and many people can be encouraged by reading all the words we share here, the LORD will comfort them and give them the strength to hang it there. We don’t hang on to mere human words, we have The Word of our Savior and the Holy Spirit as our teacher and comforter.
Be encouraged to see that in the midst of our suffering God is using us to comfort others.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.
II Corinthians 1:3-4
We are praying for you 
The LORD bless you and protect you from all evil, and give you all the comfort and peace that you need!
In Christ,
Anca
I wanted to remove this - thank you for your prayers
Good afternoon Mercy-me
As I read through your previous post this passage spoke to me. Please understand I am not judging or condemning you, just wanting to help you!
Rev 3v 18-21
I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see.
Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be ernest, and repent. Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.
Please always remember when we ask Jesus Christ into our lives he will not leave us. However we tend to stray from him, maybe because we don’t FEEL as close. Our relationship with him is not a feeling it is our faith in him. Nothing we have done or can do on our own just his unfailingly Love for us!!
Bless you and continue to fight the good fight because our Blessed Hope is closer than ever.
Nick
This is beautiful and so uplifting. I saw myself in this person and wondered what good am I. If I cannot be used by the One who died for me, what is my worth? Maybe I am to be broken like Mephibosheth, but I think there is much more to come. Oh, Lord please do the work you have to do so I may sit at your table and drink in your goodness. Being broken really hurts!
Glad you are back here among family dear one. Corrie ten Boom said once “There is not pit so deep that God is not deeper still”. That statement has helped me many times and considering her trials in life, I would say she has very much experienced how deep the love of God is. I pray it will give you encouragement today.
Yes, it hurts really bad, that’s why we are to weep with those who weep, not just rejoice with those who rejoice. Our culture is leaving the first part out, and it’s not ok.
”Then I went down to the potter’s house, and there he was, making something at the wheel. And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter; so he made it again into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to make.“
Jeremiah 18:3-4
These words in Jeremiah are so profound, the vessel was marred in the hand of the potter…
He is the Potter, I am the vessel of clay… does not the One who made me have the right to mold me the way He wants?
I know 100% the LORD has the best reason for breaking and molding us, it is 100% because He loves us. Just think how if a baby is sick some medicine or treatment the baby needs could cause a certain amount of pain. The baby doesn’t understand why he has to endure that pain, but the parent does and the reason for the treatment is love for the baby. In the same way we don’t understand that the reason we have to go through brokenness is always because God loves us, not because He enjoys torturing us.
”For He does not afflict willingly, Nor grieve the children of men.“
Lamentations 3:33
We live in a fallen world where suffering is inevitable. The book of Job is the oldest book in the Bible. That means God wanted us to know from the very beginning that suffering is a part of this life. But soon we will be saved from it all forever, we will never suffer again once we are with Jesus.
@Mercy-me I’m including you as I wanted you to read this. I’m praying for you.
God Bless!
Edit: Adding one more thing…
The words below from Tozer are very sober, and if we desire to be used by the LORD, we have to be willing to be prepared and molded for it. But God knows each and everyone of us, and it’s never a “one size fits all” work that He does in us. There’s no need to fear, God will not allow any of us to go through unreasonable experience of suffering, He always has a good reason and if He allowed hardship in my life, He will see me through it all. It hurts bad, but somehow He gives the strength to hang in there, even if it’s just by a thread.
It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until he has hurt him deeply.
God actually rises up storms of conflict in relationships at times in order to accomplish that deeper work in our character. We cannot love our enemies in our own strength. This is graduate-level grace. Are you willing to enter this school? Are you willing to take the test? If you pass, you can expect to be elevated to a new level in the Kingdom. For He brings us through these tests as preparation for greater use in the Kingdom. You must pass the test first.
Sobering, it might sound frightening but we shouldn’t fear for …“The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.”
Luke 18:27
I also removed the irelevant parts to keep the discussion clean 
This song called Make Me Willing, goes waaaay back for m(1978)e when I was a young adult learning about how God uses our brokeness to draw us closer to Him…to be the vessels our Master will use.
It is through our struggles, our sorrow that we can see how much we need our Lord.
PS - I can not tell you the thousands of tears I have shed while being completely heartbroken , listening to this song and giving my brokeness to Him. This song has been my go to song since my 20’s when I dedicated my life to Jesus. I was saved as ayoung child tho.
I am sharing this in hope that it can help someone as it did for me
I must add tha all our troubles, ttrials and sorrows WILL SOON BE OVER!!!
I realize many of you who are currently going through deep distress and hardships may not even be able to handle music at times. I’ve experienced that for long periods of time; thank the LORD I was still able to read. That always brought a certain amount of comfort. There is a time for everything…
Everything Has Its Time
1 To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under heaven:
2 A time to be born,
And a time to die;
A time to plant,
And a time to pluck what is planted;
3 A time to kill,
And a time to heal;
A time to break down,
And a time to build up;
4 A time to weep,
And a time to laugh;
A time to mourn,
And a time to dance;
5 A time to cast away stones,
And a time to gather stones;
A time to embrace,
And a time to refrain from embracing;
6 A time to gain,
And a time to lose;
A time to keep,
And a time to throw away;
7 A time to tear,
And a time to sew;
A time to keep silence,
And a time to speak;
8 A time to love,
And a time to hate;
A time of war,
And a time of peace.
Be aware of that. Deliverance will come, we just can’t control the timing. We need to accept that.
If you’re reading this and you’re going through a deep valley, know there will be an end to that. If the LORD doesn’t rapture before your trial is over, here’s a wise song; keep it for when trial has passed, the words are true and the music is adequate, if you can handle music.
The LORD bless you and protect you from every evil, every split second.
Sincerely in Christ,
@channah
